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Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Season 8 • Episode 9 • Stephen Colbert
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Whose Line Is It Anyway? Season 8, Episode 9: Stephen Colbert
Seating Order: Wayne, Stephen, Colin, and Ryan.Superheroes: Trying to solve the worldwide crisis of no clean underwear are: Colin: Underwear Man Ryan: Totally Worships Colin Man Wayne: The Chippendale Kid Stephen: Angry New York Cop Man. Scene To Music: In a very busy restaurant, customer Colin complains to chef Ryan about his meal; they react to spaghetti Western music coming in midway through the scene. Song Styles: Wayne sings to Toby, who plays violin with the American Youth Symphony, as Michael Jackson. Newsflash: Colin reports from UFOs attacking Japan to Stephen and Ryan in the studio. Stand Sit Bend: Wayne and Colin are a angry couple returning their car to Ryan's used car lot. Foreign Film Dub: Wayne(translated by Colin) and Stephen(translated by Ryan) act out a scene from the German film Don't Touch My Sauerkraut. Helping Hands: Ryan(with Colin's hands) is a nervous teenage girl getting ready for the prom and Drew is her girlfriend helping her prepare.Winner: Ryan and Colin Credit Reading: None. Watch Whose Line Is It Anyway? Season 8, Episode 9 Stephen Colbert in HD free online. Enjoy high-quality streaming of Whose Line Is It Anyway? Season 8, Episode 9 and share your thoughts in the comments below!
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Episodes
21 episodes
Denny Siegel
In Fashion Models, Denny commentates on the Security Guard Fashion Show. In Let's Make a Date, Denny must choose from a Spanish game show host (Wayne), an inept lap dancer (Colin), and a man in traction after an accident caused by Denny (Ryan). In Narrate, Colin and Ryan act out a film noir scene at a bus stop. Film Dub has Ryan, Denny, and Colin improvising an announcement at the airline office. In Film, Theatre and Television Styles, Wayne is an upstart young pool hustler challenging Ryan, the veteran pool guy. In Hey, You Down There!, Denny narrates for Ryan and Colin in “How to Cope with Problems on a Long Road Trip.” In Props, it's Ryan and Denny vs. Colin and Wayne. Finally, the entire gang, except Drew, sing another Blind Date Hoedown.
22 min
Chip Esten
Seating Order: Wayne, Chip, Colin and Ryan.Weird Newscasters: Reporting on The Six O'Clock News are: Anchor: Colin(Woodrow 'But Don't Have' A. Paddle) Co-Anchor: Chip(Zinc Lightly), a used car salesman who'll sell anything Sports: Wayne, Michael Jackson at 100 determined to show he's still got it Weather: Ryan(Spunky), the Back to the Future scientist desperate to power up his time-traveling Delorean. Title Sequence: Wayne and Chip sing the theme song to the new hit TV series Mel Gibson and the Wrestler with Colin and Ryan acting out the title sequence. Scenes from a Hat: The winning entires in the hillbilly poetry competition, the right way and the wrong way, what you would choose to do if you knew a huge meteor was about to hit the Earth, bad things to see written in the sky, things they never write songs about, and weird things to get turned on by. Greatest Hits: Colin and Ryan sell the compilation CD Songs of the Fireman. Chip and Wayne sing: Carry Your Head On My Shoulder as the Osmonds Oops, We Hit The Dog in 'country boogie' style. Hoedown: About professors and dentists, Drew replacing Chip.Winner: Chip Credit Reading: Chip as a game show announcer reading the prize list.
22 min
Brad Sherwood & Patrick Bristow
Seating Order: Brad, Patrick, Colin and Ryan.Questions Only: The scene is chaos in Manhattan as Godzilla approaches. Sound Effects: Colin is a beach bum who loves water sports trying to impress girls at the beach; Ryan provides the sfx. Song : Brad sings to Wilma, a schedule coordinator at a medical school in Indianapolis, as Oasis. Props: Brad and Patrick vs. Ryan and Colin. Sportscasters: Brad (Peter Bundtcake) and Patrick (Chelsea Swirl) commentate on competing gardeners Ryan (Franco) and Colin (Fargi). Daytime Talk Show: Participating in Eggs, Eggs, Eggs about Humpty Dumpty are: Host: Brad (Carl Omelet) Guest #1: Ryan (Thomas Guide, Humpty's lawyer) Guest #2: Patrick (Clifford Forehead, one of the king's men and also first on the scene) Audience Member: Colin (called 'the doofus' by Drew) Hoedown: About weddings. Stand, Sit, Bend: Ryan and Drew are two members of a wedding party trying to reassure Colin, the nervous groom, that everything will be all right.Winner: Colin and Ryan Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Greg Proops
Seating Order: Greg, Wayne, Colin and Ryan.Let's Make A Date: Greg has to choose from: Wayne: a hip-hop radio DJ Colin: an 80 year old who's taken way too much aphrodisiac Ryan: a drill sargeant. Fashion Models: Greg(Mr. Snackwell) introduces models Ryan, Colin and Wayne in the race car driver fashion show. Props: Greg and Wayne vs. Ryan and Colin. Scene To Rap: All four rap about zombies; Wayne and Greg start. Party Quirks: Greg hosts: Wayne: a daredevil motorcycle stunt rider Colin: evolving from primeval ooze to man Ryan: Rocky in 30 seconds. Hoedown: About mid-terms. Helping Hands: Ryan(with Colin's hands) is going to propose to Drew, his girlfriend, during a romantic dinner together.Winner: Colin and Ryan Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Kathy Greenwood
Seating Order: Wayne, Kathy, Colin and Ryan.Let�s Make a Date: Kathy has to choose from: Wayne: E.T.�s manic frat boy brother who has come to Earth to party Colin: the world's most nervous first time flier using an airplane restroom when a violent storm hits Ryan: a talking fierce bald eagle hatching her egg Colin and preparing him for life outside the nest. Sound Effects: Ryan and Colin are two high tech American thieves break into Buckingham Palace to steal the Queen of England's jewels. They must escape when they are detected. Audience member Jess does the sfx for Ryan and audience member Marcy does them for Colin. Two Line Vocabulary: Commander Colin leads gung-ho space marines Ryan and Wayne on a mission down to the planet to seek and destroy the dreaded aliens. Ryan's lines: 'Why is this happening?' and 'Can I get one of those?' Wayne's lines: 'What's this for?' and 'Do you expect me to believe that?' Party Quirks: Kathy hosts: Wayne: a person on a TV game show where the more audience members he gets to swap clothes with each other, the more money he wins Colin: an excited teen at an amusement park who thinks everyone on the show is a thrill ride Ryan: a dog obedience trainer who thinks everyone on the show is a misbehaving pooch. Themed Restaurant: Drew and Kathy are in a circus themed restaurant with Ryan and Colin as waiter and maitre d'.Winner: Wayne Credit Reading: All four as four commuters squashed together, packed really tight, on a packed subway train.
22 min
Brad Sherwood
The special Christmas episode. Seating Order: Brad, Wayne, Colin and Ryan.Questions with Wigs: All four do a scene where an extended family gets together for Christmas dinner. Duet: Wayne and Brad sing to Santa Claus and his reindeer, Donner in the style of swing music. Sound Effects: Ryan and Colin are two doctors at a party on a snowy Christmas Eve who suddenly get called to a frantic maternity ward on the other side of town. Audience member Shawna did the sfx for Ryan, and audience member Nancy did them for Colin. Scenes from a Hat: People you don�t want to get caught with under the mistletoe, celebrities who shouldn�t release rap records, thoughts that keep Drew up at night, what Santa really does when he arrives down your chimney, and odd things to have written in icing on a cake. Helping Hands: Dynamic corporate boss Ryan(with Colin's hands) has invited his newest recruit to the company, Drew, over for Christmas dinner. Winner: Wayne Credit Reading: All four as Santa�s squabbling elves, with Santa and Donner watching.
22 min
Denny Siegel
Seating Order: Wayne, Denny, Colin, and Ryan.Fashion Models: Denny emcees the construction worker fashion show; with the others as the models. Film, TV, and Theatre Styles: Colin approaches his neighbor, Ryan, to complain about Ryan's pit bull. Styles: Gangster movie, romance, slasher film, surfer movie, science fiction movie, and spaghetti Western. Scene To Rap: All four rap a scene set at the circus. Old Job New Job: At the dentist's, Wayne is the patient, Denny the hygenist and Ryan and Colin the dentists(who used to be firefighters). Narrate: Ryan and Colin do a film noir scene set in a laundromat. Dating Service Videos/Hats: Wayne and Denny vs. Ryan and Colin doing the world's worst dating service videos. Hoedown: About giving birth.Winner: None Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Brad Sherwood
Seating Order: Brad, Wayne, Colin, and Ryan.Daytime Talk Show: Bible, Bible, Everywhere profiles Noah's Ark. Participating are: Host: Brad (Mass Confusion) Guest #1: Wayne (Zebecadiah Jones, Noah's neighbor) Guest #2: Ryan (Houston Pings, a meteorologist) Audience Members: Colin (a man upset that the unicorns drowned, and a women disgusted with both the guests). Sound Effects: Colin is Indiana Jones trying to find an ancient treasure in a booby-trapped cave. Scene To Rap: All four rap a scene involving a train wreck. Ice Skaters: Ryan and Colin are Olympic ice skaters doing their final routine, of which the subject is getting up in the morning. Improbable Mission: Colin and Ryan are secret agents who must mow the lawn, per instructions on the tape given by Brad. Dead Bodies: In a deleted scene from Titanic, Jack(Ryan) is drawing Rose(audience member Julie) in the nude when her fiance(Wayne) bursts in and announces they've just struck an iceberg. Ryan and Julie are dead, Wayne dies when he enters the scene, Colin takes their bodies and keeps the scene going. Questions Only: Tension breaks out in the gangster world of 1930's Chicago; Drew replaces Brad.Winner: Brad Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Stephen Colbert
Seating Order: Wayne, Stephen, Colin, and Ryan.Superheroes: Trying to solve the worldwide crisis of no clean underwear are: Colin: Underwear Man Ryan: Totally Worships Colin Man Wayne: The Chippendale Kid Stephen: Angry New York Cop Man. Scene To Music: In a very busy restaurant, customer Colin complains to chef Ryan about his meal; they react to spaghetti Western music coming in midway through the scene. Song Styles: Wayne sings to Toby, who plays violin with the American Youth Symphony, as Michael Jackson. Newsflash: Colin reports from UFOs attacking Japan to Stephen and Ryan in the studio. Stand Sit Bend: Wayne and Colin are a angry couple returning their car to Ryan's used car lot. Foreign Film Dub: Wayne(translated by Colin) and Stephen(translated by Ryan) act out a scene from the German film Don't Touch My Sauerkraut. Helping Hands: Ryan(with Colin's hands) is a nervous teenage girl getting ready for the prom and Drew is her girlfriend helping her prepare.Winner: Ryan and Colin Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Greg Proops
Seating Order: Greg, Wayne, Colin, and Ryan.Award Show: Greg and Wayne host the criminals award show, with Ryan and Colin as nominees(and winners) in the audience. Newsflash: Colin reports from movie explosions to Greg and Ryan in the studio. Irish Drinking Song: About having a hairy back. Hats: Greg and Wayne vs. Ryan and Colin do the world's worst dating service videos. Film Dub: Ryan, Greg and Colin do a scene about the morning after a big party. Greatest Hits: Ryan and Colin sell the compilation CD Songs Of The Nurse. Wayne sings: It's Not That Kind Of Thermometer as Earth, Wind & Fire Turn And Cough in mariachi style. World's Worst: Hitchhikers to give a ride to; Drew replacing Wayne.Winner: Wayne Credit Reading: Wayne and Greg as two Army officers in the heat of battle deciding which soldiers to send on a dangerous mission.
22 min
Brad Sherwood
Seating Order: Brad, Wayne, Colin and Ryan.Questions Only: Colin and Brad vs. Wayne and Ryan do a scene set on an international flight. Secret: Ryan is Tarzan and Colin is Jane, with the secret in Tarzan's loin cloth. Duet: Brad and Wayne sing to Sarah, an auditor, in pop ballad style. Backwards Scene, Ryan is visiting Brad, the doctor and Colin, the nurse as Ryan says good-bye. Party Quirks, Brad hosts: Wayne: an android servant malfunctioning Colin: a criminal on the run using all modes of transportation Ryan: a mouse narrowly avoiding being killed. Daytime Talk Show: Participating in Hey, It's Past 12 O'Clock, Where's That Pumpkin? are: Host: Brad(Farley Tail) Guest #1: Wayne(LeStrange, claimimg the story was modeled after her) Guest #2: Colin(Salmonella, one of Cinderella's beauty-impaired sisters, claiming they didn't treat her mean) Audience Members: Ryan(a man who wants to know where Jerry is and a woman who thinks the guests are too hard on Cinderella). Hoedown: About snoring.Winner: None named Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Brad Sherwood
Seating Order: Brad, Wayne, Colin and Ryan.Fashion Models: Brad is the host of the cowboy fashion show, the others are the models. Number Of Words: From Charlie's Angels: Colin is Bosley, and he has been captured by villainous female Wayne. Ryan and Brad are two Angels. Doo Wop: Wayne, Brad and Ryan sing a doo wop song about Carol, who died tragically in a freak gardening accident. Scenes From A Hat: What Olympic medalists are really thinking when listening to the national anthem, things the pilot wished he hadn't said when the intercom was on and things that should'nt have ejector seats. Party Quirks: Brad hosts: Wayne: a fight sequence from Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon Colin: a lost bloodhound trying to find his owner from the pair of underwear he found Ryan: finalists competing in the World's Sexiest Hillbilly contest. Bartender: Brad pours the drinks for: Wayne: celebrating his wedding Colin: angry that he's an alcoholic. Quick Change: Colin and Brad are dangerous poachers caught by sherriff Ryan. Drew is off camera calling 'change.'Winner: Wayne Credit Reading: All four as magicians doing their best tricks.
22 min
Denny Siegel
Seating Order: Wayne, Denny, Colin, and Ryan.Weird Newscasters: Reporting on The Six O'Clock Evening News are: Anchor: Denny(Fifi Leadbottom) Co-Anchor: Colin(Rock Solid), an awkward teenager on his first date with Denny Sports: Wayne, Richard Simmons Weather: Ryan(Rock 'Paper And' Scissors), attatched to Denny by a strong rubber band. Song Styles: Wayne sings to Shelly, a housewife with a year-and-a half old, as James Brown. Narrate: Colin and Ryan do a film noir scene set in a bowling alley. Props: Wayne and Colin vs. Denny and Ryan. Greatest Hits: Ryan and Colin sell the compilation CD Songs Of The Fish Cutter. Wayne sings: 'Of Cod And Country' in swing style 'Someone Call The Carps' in reggae style 'Your Plaice Or Mine?' in classic rock-and-roll style. Dead Bodies: Drew, Denny, Colin and audience member Jerress do the following scene: Drew is a Baywatch lifeguard who has just saved Jerress from drowning and Denny is his jealous girlfriend. However, Drew and Jerress are dead and when Denny comes in she dies. Colin carries on the scene by manipulating them.Winner: Denny and Colin Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Brad Sherwood & Ian Gomez
Seating Order: Brad, Ian, Colin, and Ryan.Daytime Talk Show: Participating in Hills, Hills, Hills about Jack And Jill are: Host: Brad(Carlos Mountain Topper) Guest #1: Ryan(Dr. Phillip Glassman, Jack's personal physician) Guest #2: Colin(Johnny Williams, the owner of the hill) Audience Member: Ian(Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater; also Jill's stepbrother). Film, TV and Theatre Styles: Ryan and Colin have been working too long at the fish-cutting factory, and Colin is beginning to crack. Styles: Martha Stewart, Elvis movie, The Shining, Power Rangers and family movie. Song Styles: Brad sings to Lynelle, a marketing assistant for a home video movie company, in the style of a country western ballad. Newsflash: Ryan reports from a crowd of women at a department store sale to Brad, Colin and Ian in the studio. Props: Brad and Colin vs. Ryan and Ian. Sports Commentators: Brad and Ian report on rival flight attendants Ryan and Colin. 90-Second Alphabet: In and old West saloon, Ryan accuses Drew of cheating in a card game and Colin is Miss Kitty trying to calm things down; starting with 'L'.Winner: Ryan and Colin Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Brad Sherwood & Patrick Bristow
Seating Order: Brad, Patrick, Colin, and Ryan.Let's Make A Date: Patrick has to choose from: Brad: a catty Vegas showgirl Colin: Hannibal Lecter Ryan: a boisterous drunk in a strip club. Film, TV and Theatre Styles: Ryan and Colin are alligator hunters in the Everglades. Styles: Elvis, horror movie, South Park, Star Trek, martial arts movie, and Lone Ranger. Weird Newscasters: Reporting on The 11:30 News are: Anchor: Brad(Oblong Monkeyplaster) Co-Anchor: Ryan(Cheese Slices), a bad magician Sports: Patrick(Turkey Baster), an emotional actor accepting an award Weather: Colin(Relish Sandalstraps), desperate to go to the bathroom. Secret: Ryan and Colin are Adam and Eve with the secret(an extra rib) under a fig leaf. Newsflash: Colin reports from people playing and living underwater to Ryan, Patrick and Brad in the studio. Scene To Rap: Brad and Patrick, joined later by Colin and Ryan, do a scene at a mini-mart.Winner: All four Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Greg Proops
Seating Order: Greg, Wayne, Colin and Ryan.Superheroes: Solving the worldwide crisis of no beer are: Greg: Super Bum Ryan: Rodeo Boy Colin: Captain Nosy Wayne: Captain Totally Made Of Springs. Sound Effects: Colin is a monk who escapes from his monastery for a night on the town. Ryan provides his noises. Props: Greg and Wayne vs. Ryan and Colin. Hey You Down There: Greg narrates a 1950's public information film about preparing for a nuclear attack with Ryan and Colin acting it out. Daytime Talk Show: Talking about Hey, Diddle Diddle are: Host: Greg Guest #1: Ryan(Prof. Phillips of the Phillps Observatory) Guest #2: Colin(Filly Felroid, who worked to get the cow to jump over the moon) Audience Members: Wayne(Dr. Ramba Shahlabahugodomestuibe and and the mother of the little boy who laughed). Scene To Rap: All four rap a scene set at a a school. Hats/Dating Service Videos: Wayne and Greg vs. Ryan and Colin.Winner: None named Credit Reading: None.
22 min
Kathy Greenwood
Seating Order: Wayne, Kathy, Colin, Ryan Lets Make a Date: Kathy must choose from Wayne: Rocky training for a fight. Colin: Shape shifting terminator who becomes an evil version of whoever he touches. Ryan: Turning into a protective mother penguin catching food for her young. Whose line: Ryan is Peter Pan and has flown into Wendy's (Colin) bedroom for the first time to ask for her help. Props: Colin+ Wayne vs. Kathy+ Ryan Greatest Hits: Colin and Ryan sell the compilation CD Songs of James Bond. Wayne sings 007 Heaven by Chcuk Berry, I Just do it For the Women as Aerosmith and No, I expect you to Die as Tina Turner. Foreign Film Dub: Drew(translated by Ryan) and Kathy(translated by Colin) act out a scene from the Hebrew film Mashuganuh! Winner: Wayne Credit Reading: Wayne as the ugly hillbilly
22 min
Jeff Davis
Seating order: Wayne, Jeff, Colin, Ryan Hollywood Director: Wayne is a gangster boss who has been shot and staggers into the emergency room where he forces surgeon Ryan to extract the bullets. Jeff is a hit man who bursts in, gun in hand, determined to finish him off. Notes: Headlining Las Vegas performers, Swedish porn movie. Whose Line: Held-up in a shack surrounded by outlaws, the Lone Ranger (Colin) and Tonto (Ryan) try to figure out a plan. Two Line Vocabulary: Colin is the mastermind behind Jurassic Park is briefing his park workers Ryan and Wayne because the dinosaurs have escaped and gone on a rampage. Wayne's lines: 'What do you want me to do?' and 'That's not my thing'. Ryan's lines: 'What's that?' and 'Are you mad?'. Greatest hits: Ryan and Colin are selling Songs of Norway. Wayne and Jeff sing A Boy Named Hagar as Jonny Cash, Norway's lovely, Rather be in Greece as the Temptations (with a gradually increasing tempo) and the Ska song Small small hole, big big fish. World's Worst: World's worst person to be a member of the armed forces (with Drew) Winner: Jeff Credit Reading: Everyone reads the credits as competitors in the final of the spring break 'best buns' competition
22 min
Greg Proops
Seating Order: Greg, Wayne, Colin, Ryan Questions Only: High school reunion Film, TV and Theatre : Ryan is a volcano expert talking to Greg, the sceptical mayor on the lip of a dormant volcano showing signs of life. : Kung Fu movie, Horror movie, Kabuki, infomercial, striptease. Song : Wayne sings to Sarah the teacher as James Brown. Props: Colin+ Ryan vs. Greg+ Wayne. Gameshow: Greg hosts Who's your Daddy? Hats: Ryan+ Colin vs. Wayne+ Greg; World's worst dating service video. Scene to Rap: Scene based in a Laundromat. Winner: None Credit reading: None
22 min
Brad Sherwood
Seating order: Brad, Wayne, Colin, Ryan Lets make a date: Brad much choose from Wayne: Angry teen rebel from a 1950s movie. Colin: Store owner doing his own low budget commercial. Ryan: raised by wolves Film, TV and Theatre : Ryan is angry at Colin 'cause they have been forced to make an emergency landing of their light aircraft in bigfoot territory. : Soap opera, infomercial, horror film, football film, western. Gameshow: Brad hosts Pick the cheese Shopping from home: Ryan and Colin sell a drawer with no bottom, 3 playing cards and one shoe Scenes from a hat: When beavers get lazy, a magazine you'd never see at a news stand, ice fishing disasters, unlikely greeting card messages, lying about a stain at your dry cleaners, tattoos you regret later, breakfast with the boneless family, a bachelor's refrigerator, what Bill Clinton's tombstone will say, looking at the ugliest baby you've ever seen. Hoedown: About vending machines Winner: None Credit Reading: None
22 min
Greg Proops & Denny Siegel
Seating order: Greg, Denny, Colin, Ryan Superheroes: Solving the worldwide problem of no shoelaces is Greg: Spineless man, Ryan: Seductive shower boy, Colin: Salmonella kid, Denny: Bitchy gossip woman Sound effects: Colin is American GI escaping a POW camp (like in the Great Escape) with sound effects provided by Ryan Film, TV and Theatre : Greg is a jockey and finds Ryan, a rival jockey, injecting something into his horse. : Love story, exorcist, musical, puppet show. Let's make a date: Denny must choose from Greg: Horse race announcer. Colin: Passenger on a plane when the window blows open. Ryan: desperate criminal on the run, cornered in the studio Number of words: Ryan is a GI stationed in Hawaii, Denny is his girlfriend. Greg is a beautiful pregnant Hawaiian girl and Colin is Greg's angry mother. Colin 4 Greg 2 Denny 3 Ryan 6 Moving people: Ryan is store detective who notices Colin put something in his coat pocket. Foreign film dub: Drew (translated by Ryan) and Denny (translated by Greg) act out a scene from The endless day in Italian. Winner: Denny Credit Reading: None
22 min