Dorkly Bits Season 3, Episode 43: 'Legend of Zelda' Hermit Wants To Haggle

Zelda's Boyfriend

You must defeat Ganon to reach The Friend Zone.

Ash Gets a Digimon

Digimon are not the champions.

Final Fantasy Thief Steals Wallet

He's hellbent on destruction and meatball subs.

Link Finds Ganon's Weakness

A true warrior fears no beep.

Fi Annoys Link

I'd take "Hey, listen!" over this any day.

Ski Free Yeti Gets Desperate

He's got a few tricks up his furry, pixelated sleeve.

Ken Wants to be Ryu

Imitation is the sincerest form of annoyance.

Mario is Too Mainstream

You've probably heard of him.

Luigi Meets Waluigi

You can't judge a book by its cover. It's usually way worse.

Excitebike Maniac

Sportsmanship is for losers.

Bowser's Marital Problems

Never base a marriage around mutual hatred for a plumber.

Bioshock Little Sister's Big Date

Big Daddy is just a tad overprotective.

Puzzle Quest Ogre is a Nerd

All is fair in love and puzzles.

Tiny Tower Residents Can't Leave

They've got everything you need forever and ever.

Red Wastes a Masterball

His first mistake was giving the company's prized possession to an 11-year-old.

Videogame Dog Park

Player 1's best friend.

Limbo with a Flashlight

Objects may not be as scary as they appear.

Angry Sun Hates Mario

His first priority is killing a plumber. His second is maintaining life on Earth.

Disney's Game of Thrones

In the game of thrones, you win or you're thrown in the Disney vault.

Mortal Kombat Security Guard

If they keep killing each other, they're going to get a warning.

Uncle Owen Ruins Star Wars

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away....nothing interesting happened.

Zelda II Sex Scene

A potion would have been far more tasteful.

X-Men Disappoint Magneto

They could have at least sent X-Factor.

TMNT Child Protective Services

The government is cool, but rude.

Final Fantasy VII Controversy

You say tomato, I say tomana.

Fan Fiction Dragon Ball Z

His power level is almost as absurd as the creative liberties.

BurgerTime Chef Gets a New Job

Whatever you do, don't ask him to Super-Size it.

Mario Goes Berserk

Mario's done playing Mr. Nice Plumber.

Toad House Is Rigged

Mario doesn't like getting played.

Mega Man Meets The Wire

Baltimore, 20XX. E-Tank dealers own the streets now.

Hypno's Having Trouble

Given his name, it's not like he had a whole bunch of career options.

Jurassic Yoshi

An adventure 16 bits in the making...

Mario Skips World 2

Hey, no one told him to liberate the WHOLE kingdom.

Sub-Zero Stays Dizzy

Sometimes a brutal fatality is better than the alternative.

Videogame Realtor

She can show you some lovely residential property in Sim City.

Bug Catcher Waits

Life is harden for a bug-type trainer.

Sub-Zero's Glasses Are Broken

You should empty your pockets before entering the Earthrealm.

Disney Channel's Kingdom Hearts

The Black Mages of Waverly Place must be behind this.

Regular Guiseppe, The Third Mario Brother

He'd save the princess, but his back pain's really been acting up lately.

Pac-Man's Pac-Wedding

Grab a slice of dot-flavored wedding cake.

River City Ransom Girlfriend

The secret to a strong relationship is merciless violence.

Dhalsim's Losing His Touch

He’s stretching the truth.

Babality Is a Big Responsibility

It takes a true champion to raise a child.

Roller Coaster Tycoon Disaster

These rides are to die for. To die painfully and horrifically for.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Elevator Troubles

Small talk is NOT radical.

Bowser's Weekend With The Kids

Today’s youth needs to understand the value of a hard day’s princess kidnapping.

Donkey Kong Meets With His Agent

This is a deal you can’t throw a barrel at.

Sonic Gets Engaged

He’s finally out of the Friend Zone.

Boos Meet a Real Ghost

He’s pretty (bone-)chill(ing).

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 1 - The Journey Begins

A new Dorkly series, about a trainer who has what it takes to be the very worst, like no one ever was.

Legend of Zelda's 'Goodnight, Moon'

A bedtime story for the next three days.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 2 - Rusty's Rival

The world’s worst Pokemon trainer finally meets his match. Check out Episode 1 here.

Jax's New Arms

He’s armed and dangerous.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 3 - Team Rocket

If you’re gonna catch ‘em all, you gotta have Pokeballs. Check out episodes one and two.

Batman Goes to the Movies

His movie-going experience must be more severe.

Peach's Revenge (Part 1)

She’s putting you in another castle. Morgue Castle.

Paralyzed Pokemon Returns

You can break his spine, but you’ll never break his spirit.

Resident Evil Political Ad

He's got the brains Washington needs (in his digestive track).

Iron Man's Drunk

Tony Stark: just your average billionaire playboy raging alcoholic.

Earthbound Photographer's Surprise

Maybe he should have just had them say "cheese.

Chrono Trigger Doppel Doll's Other Use

He's more of an "action figure" than a "doll," if you catch my drift.

Sonic Meets Original Fan Characters

He's the fastest thing alive (except for Doug the Hedgehog, who is literally twice as fast as the speed of light).

Voltorb Doesn't Want To Die

He really doesn't want to bomb this battle.

Link's Wish

It's not delivery, it's destiny.

Paperboy Newsroom

A paperboy who doesn't destroy every window in sight? News to me.

Superman's Bad Day

The man of steel needs to look out.

Banjo's Big Mix-Up

Link's Fun Uncle Dies

It's dangerous to go alone. Take a brewski, kiddo.

Smoke's Not Doing Well

Fights to the death are the number one way to quit smoking.

Emergency XCOM Meeting

Mario's Ex

Exes are like Boos: they always come back to haunt you.

Mortal Misunderstanding

It's the beginning of the happy ending.

Legend of Zelda: The Se7en Sages

His sins are coming back to haunt him.

Robotnik's New Nickname

You can't make an omelette without cracking a few jerks.

Videogame Trick-or-Treating

Luke Skywalker's Adoption

A bad idea in a galaxy far, far away.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 4 - Snorcrash

Nothing can keep a good Pokemon trainer down. Nothing can keep Rusty down, either. Click here to catch up on the first season of Pokemon Rusty.

Mario Can't Play the Warp Whistle

Music can really take your places. Horrible, unspeakable places.

Nobody Likes the Toasty Guy

It's hard making friends, especially when you're yelling made-up exclamations in falsetto.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 5 - Celadon Mall

Not even a Full Restore could cure Rusty's mall madness.

Pokemon Daycare Reunion

Magikarp never forgets.

Sonic, Lord of the Rats

Save the vermin, ruin the world.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 6 - HM Madness

Some machines were meant to stay hidden.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 7 - EV Trainer

If you want to be the very best, you have to be the absolute worst.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 8 - Gym Fight

Hit the Cinnabar Island Gym for the ultimate workout.

Dad Piggies

No one makes haphazardly-put-together deathmobiles like dad.

A Mortal Kombat Khristmas

You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm tellin' you why: Shao Kahn's reign is brutal and merciless and he punishes the weak.

Pokemon Rusty: Ep. 9 - The Newest Member of Team Rocket

Prepare for trouble, make it single.