Melissa & Joey Season 3, Episode 35: You're the One That I Want

Works for Me

Mel tries to convince Joe of his importance to her and the family after she learns that he has been looking for another job.

22 min

Toxic Parents

Melissa and Joe are both happy in their new relationships, until they discover they are dating a divorced couple. Meanwhile, Lennox decides to get a tattoo after her boyfriend Zander forbids her and Ryder is surprised to find he actually misses school.

22 min

Inside Job

Joe paints Mel into a corner, forcing her to get him a job at City Hall with fellow City Council member Paul. Once there, Joe gets wrapped up in another potential financial scandal, leading to all sorts of headaches for Mel. Meanwhile, Lennox is torn between her boyfriend Zander and her hot co-star in the school play, Archer.

22 min

Can't Hardly Wait

Joe dates his chiropractor following a back injury, and he doesn't want to rush their new romance. Elsewhere, Ryder and Zander team up to work on a graphic novel, but the project hits a sour note when Lennox becomes their editor.

22 min

Oh Brother

Mel's childhood friend, Austin, moves back to Toledo, and he and Mel quickly take their old friendship to a new level. But Joe starts to think that Mel and Austin may in fact be related, and schemes to break them up. Meanwhile, enterprising Lennox sells ads on her blog to earn extra money, but is horrified to discover her first sponsor may participate in unfair labor practices.

22 min

The Truth Hurts

Joe accidentally injures Mel's boyfriend, Austin, during a competitive game of pool. Mel accuses Joe of doing it on purpose to ruin her romantic weekend getaway. Meanwhile, Joe invites a nerdy kid to join Ryder in his home school studies, and Lennox takes to psychoanalyzing everyone in the house.

22 min

The Unkindest Cut

Mel is taken aback when she finds out that Austin may not share her vision of their future and is resolute in his belief he never wants children. Meanwhile, Joe's new girlfriend is only interested in a physical connection, which leaves him confused and wanting more in the relationship. And, Lennox can't motivate herself to write her college entrance paper, so she hires Ryder to be her full time babysitter until she does.

22 min

The Unfriending

After Joe convinces Mel to dump her needy friend Anita, he secretly starts dating her. Meanwhile, Lennox gets super competitive and becomes determined to beat Zander’s test scores. And Ryder is bummed when all of his friends delete him from their social media sites.

22 min

Something Happened

Mel desperately wants to be the cool aunt after she discovers that Lennox has taken her relationship with Zander to the next level, but Joe just wants to kill Zander. Meanwhile, Ryder's naïve girlfriend Keira is impressed with his undeserved bad boy reputation, but he discovers her parents are not.

22 min

Family Feud

Mel and Joe are invited to co-host a week of “Good Morning Toledo” which Mel thinks will help her earn voters. Their constant bickering on air garners rave reviews with the audience and they’re an instant hit. But when the secret to their popularity turns out to be talking a little too personally about Lennox and Ryder, they have to decide if fame or family is more important.

22 min

Fast Times

When his apartment needs to undergo emergency renovations, Mel invites her new boyfriend Noah to temporarily move in with her, accelerating their relationship.

22 min

Bad Influence

When Joe and Ryder sell Mel's old belongings, they inadvertently sell a very personal item of hers. Desperate to reclaim her property, Mel and Joe turn to crime to get it back. Meanwhile, Lennox's new pen pal is eager to meet her in person, after his release from prison.

22 min

Teach Your Children

Joe works out an alternative payment plan when he begins dating the mom of one of his students, which unintentionally earns him a reputation among the other mothers in the neighborhood as a tutor-prostitute. Meanwhile, Zander and Lennox decide to skip college and drive around the country in a motor home – which doesn't sit well with "cool" aunt Mel. And Ryder introduces his vegan girlfriend to the joys of meat.

22 min

What Happens in Jersey... (1)

In failing health, Joe's grandmother Sofia begs him to come visit her one last time for her birthday, and to bring his beautiful wife Tiffany along. Since Joe never got around to telling "Nona" he and Tiffany got divorced, he's forced to beg Mel to pretend to be his trampy ex. Soon, Joe and Mel are on the road to Jersey with Lennox and Ryder tagging along.

22 min

What Happens in Jersey... (2)

22 min

A New Kind of Christmas

Mel's sister, Meredith (Jaime Pressly), comes home from prison on furlough to celebrate Christmas with the kids and Mel, and seems unruffled by Joe's obvious animosity towards her. Note: this episode is a Christmas special and was only put in after EP15 because it was near Christmas. Episode 15 ends on a cliff hanger and is continued in episode 17.

22 min

A Decent Proposal

Mel's sister Meredith comes home from prison on furlough to celebrate Christmas with the kids and Mel, and seems unruffled by Joe's obvious animosity towards her.

22 min

Independence Day

Joe rushes home to tell Mel that he has feelings for her after their romantic night together in New Jersey. When he arrives, he's shocked to find Austin has shown up and wants to give his relationship with Mel another try. Deciding he can't stay and watch them fall in love all over again, Joe quits. Meanwhile, Lennox plots to get Joe and Mel together and Ryder gets sick from his own cooking.

22 min

The New Deal

Mel insists on Joe "courting" her, but soon becomes frustrated at their lack of time together. Desperate to spend time with him, Mel sneaks over to his new digs, where he works as a live-in nanny, risking getting him fired—for a second time in as many weeks. Meanwhile, after witnessing a robbery, Ryder expects a hero’s welcome, but is horrified to discover that his interview with the local news has been turned into a viral video called "I Peed My Pants."

22 min

Feel the Burn

Mel joins an exercise boot camp to lose weight before an eight-course meal; Joe clashes with a celebrity chef; Lennox and Zander try to sell their Internet series.

22 min

Plus One

Mel takes Joe to a work dinner. Upon meeting the press, Joe starts to spout his—and Mel’s—opinions on issues, which garners Mel bad press. Meanwhile, Ryder musters up the courage to ask his new Chem partner Stella out on a date.

22 min

House Broken

Mel adopts a dog despite knowing that Joe doesn't want one, then feels ignored when he forms a bond with the pooch; Ryder spends time with Stella's daughter.

22 min

Couples Therapy

Mel gets a reluctant Joe to agree to couple’s therapy to work on their constant arguing. But she’s completely caught off guard when the therapist turns out to be Joe’s ex-girlfriend. Meanwhile, Lennox is conflicted about dating her Teaching Assistant after Zander shows up on her porch.

22 min

To Tell the Truth

Mel and Joe have a fun game night with married couple Nate and Gillian, whom they hope to remain good friends with. But then Nate tells Joey a big secret…that Joe in turn tells Mel…who then tells Gillian… Meanwhile, after flunking out of art school, Zander shows up begging Ryder to let him secretly hide out in the basement without Lennox knowing.

22 min

My Roof, My Rules

Lennox moves out after Mel forbids her from dating her teaching assistant; Ryder is stuck at the Canadian border when he can't find his passport.

22 min

Chaperones

Mel and Joe serve as chaperones at Ryder's school dance, then get kicked out of the event; Ryder changes his mind about breaking up with Stella.

22 min

I'll Cut You

Mel is completely on Joe’s side when he’s involved in a hit and run, until she discovers the other driver is her beloved hairdresser Calista. Meanwhile, Ryder tries to win Stella back with a grand romantic gesture during class — much to the frustration of her teacher.

22 min

Catch & Release

Joe gets into hot water when he tries to help a recently divorced friend get back into the dating game; Zander's decision to move in with two female coeds does not sit well with Lennox.

22 min

Born to Run

Mel's wild father sends out an inappropriate photograph that could harm her run for the state senate; Ryder tries to come up with a winning idea for a business club.

22 min

More Than Roommates

Mel wants to get rid of the ugly chair that Joe inherited from his late grandmother; Ryder pretends to be a college student to get close to one of Zander's roommates.

22 min

Accidents Will Happen

Mel gets surprising news from her doctor, but is not sure if the timing is right to share it with Joe; Ryder forms a study group with an attractive student and the class genius.

22 min

Right Time, Right Place

Mel has everything she needs for the perfect wedding after a close friend unexpectedly calls off her nuptials; Lennox helps Ryder construct an untruthful resume.

22 min

Don't Look Back in Anger

Mel and Joe recall the years they have spent together as they try to convince a counselor that they have the perfect relationship.

22 min

Uninvited

Mel is less than thrilled when Joe’s mom drops by, but it’s Joe who hits the roof when his estranged brother Tony turns up unannounced. Meanwhile, Lennox insists on helping Ryder get into college even though he has plans of his own.

22 min

Maybe I'm Amazed

Joe is forced to make a quick decision when Mel drops a bombshell on him during their wedding; Lennox is caught between Marco and Zander; Ryder tries to find the perfect time to reveal news about his future.

22 min

At Last

Mel considers breaking things off with Joe after he invites his family to move into the house; Zander attempts to win Lennox back from Marco; an online course earns Ryder an unusual credential.

22 min